


No Reproaches

by ideserveyou



Category: Arthur of the Britons
Genre: Angst, Bondage, Fights, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-08
Updated: 2010-10-08
Packaged: 2017-10-12 12:37:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,775
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/124890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ideserveyou/pseuds/ideserveyou
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kai teaches Arthur a lesson</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Reproaches

**Author's Note:**

> Set during the episode 'Rolf the Preacher'

As night deepens in Mark's village, and the central fire burns low, the women drift reluctantly off to their husbands' or fathers' huts, with many a hopeful smile or wink directed at Arthur and Kai. Mark yawns and stretches, the muscles cracking behind his broad shoulders, and heads for the longhouse; Rolf follows reluctantly in his wake, clutching his blanket and pillows, to find a spare corner to sleep in.

Arthur and Kai chuckle as they light a torch and go the other way, to the hut from which they so unceremoniously evicted Rolf earlier in the day, to kindle a new fire in the small hearth and make the bed with Rolf's remaining blankets, topped with Arthur's cloak for good measure.

Arthur sits on one side of the bed to pull off his boots and tunic. He waits for Kai to join him, but to his consternation Kai pulls his cloak back around himself, turns away and heads for the door.

'Where are you going?' Arthur's voice is sharp.

Kai turns back, one hand on the doorpost, and grins wickedly. His white teeth gleam in the firelight. 'Where do you think? You said it yourself: no reproaches from you, for once. And I have a village-full of girls from which to choose…'

Arthur can't deny it. He did say that. It even seemed amusing, at the time. But he hadn't thought about the reality.

'Now, let me see… what do I want… hmmm.' Kai muses, half to himself. 'Long dark hair and blue eyes, I think; and tall. Yes. And …'

Arthur's heart sinks. These days, Kai doesn't spend the night with a woman very often, and then only for appearance's sake; but Arthur still hates it, when he does.

'Long legs, nice arse, soft skin… ' Kai's smile grows even wider.

Arthur is hurt, and angry. 'Stop it. That's enough. Just go, if you're going, and let me get some sleep.'

'But I can do without the sharp tongue and the quick temper…'

Kai makes a face at Arthur, and drags the table across the door, to bar it; then he sits on the table and dissolves into helpless giggles. 'I can't believe you fell for it…'

But Arthur is not laughing. 'Kai, it's not funny.'

'It is funny. If you could have seen your face…' And then Kai looks again at Arthur's face, and the laughter abruptly dies from his own.

Levelly and distinctly, Arthur says, 'How I feel about you is no laughing matter. Be serious. Don't make fun of me. Not over this.'

'Very well.' Kai is off the table and across the room in one fluid movement. 'You want it serious… You asked for it.'

He hauls Arthur to his feet before he can move to defend himself, stands behind him, twists Arthur's right arm painfully up behind his back with one hand, and with the other hand holds a dagger to his throat.

'Is this serious enough for you?'

There is no trace of laughter now in his voice.

Arthur stands very still. The metal is cold against his skin, and he can feel Kai trembling with suppressed rage.

Very quietly, he says, 'You're angry; why?'

Kai says through gritted teeth, 'Can a man who has tasted the finest mead be satisfied with ditchwater? Do you trust me so little? Did you really think I'd choose one of those cackling chickens over you?'

Arthur opens his mouth to protest, but Kai is not finished.

'How I feel about you is no laughing matter either. All those times I told you – did you not hear? Did you forget?'

'Kai, I'm sorry –'

'Not sorry enough yet.'

'I –'

'Not another sound. I am going to tell you again. And this time I will make certain that you hear me, and do not forget.'

Kai's voice is curt. He turns Arthur around, and withdraws the dagger, but keeps tight hold of Arthur's arm. 'Now… get on the bed.'

Arthur is at first taken aback, and then indignant. Who does Kai think he is, to be giving the orders like this? Was Arthur's apology not good enough for him? He moves a step forward, as if to comply; then whips round in an attempt to grab the weapon from Kai's hand. But Kai has anticipated him; he flings the dagger across the hut to clatter harmlessly against the wall, and grapples with Arthur. They fight in bitter silence, wrestling across to the door and back again. They crash to the floor as Arthur kicks Kai's feet from under him, and roll over and over, still locked together. Arthur fights fiercely, but Kai is bigger and more determined, and it is he who prevails. After a blow to the midriff that winds him completely, Arthur finds himself being hauled ignominiously onto the bed and having his hands firmly tied behind his back with his own discarded belt. For the moment, he is too breathless and surprised to protest.

Kai sits down on the edge of the bed, battered and dusty and with straw in his hair, his chest heaving from his exertions. He glances down as his boot catches against something on the floor, then leans down and looks further underneath the bed.

Arthur gathers breath enough to speak. 'What on earth do you think you're doing? Loose me at once!'

'Be silent.' Kai pulls a tangle of gear out from under the bed, and straightens up again.

'Let me go!' Arthur's voice rises to an angry shout.

'I said, be silent!' Kai snaps. 'Do you want Rolf or Mark to come in and see you like this?'

'What right have you –' Arthur's protest is cut off as a big hand is clamped over his mouth. He struggles and kicks, but Kai is unmoved.

'If you won't be quiet, I'll have to make you be quiet. And our friend Rolf has just what I need. Look.'

Arthur looks, and sees that in his free hand Kai is holding a woman's girdle, woven from fine bleached linen, soft and strong.

'It seems the good preacher likes company,' Kai says thoughtfully, as he folds the cloth, holds Arthur's nose until he's forced to breathe through his mouth, then slips the gag between his teeth and secures it behind his head. 'There, that's better.'

Arthur is furious, but there is little he can do. He writhes and kicks as hard as he can, but Kai simply pushes him down flat on his back, sits on him, and proceeds very slowly and methodically to unfasten Arthur's breeches and then remove them.

'And it seems the good preacher sometimes has need of restraint.' Kai's voice is amused now. 'As do you.'

He picks up a couple of short lengths of rope from among Rolf's possessions, and secures Arthur's feet to the bedposts. Then he pushes him flat on his back once more, and turns back to the jumble of Rolf's belongings on the floor.

'Hmmm. Rolf is no ordinary holy man. I wonder how these help him in his prayers?'

He holds up his findings: a fox fur, a woman's shift of fine white cloth, a bunch of long feathers, and a small flask. He unstoppers it, takes a cautious sniff. 'No, not holy water: the finest perfumed oil. I'd like to believe he confiscated these from his flock for the good of their spiritual health. But knowing Rolf as we do…' He grins. 'I expect he's lying awake right now, hoping we haven't looked under his bed. And it's a good thing he can't see what's on top of it, either.'

Arthur's indignation rises in his throat and nearly chokes him. He has no idea what game Kai is playing, or even whether it is a game at all. This is a side to his foster-brother that he's never seen before, although he is beginning to suspect that some of the village girls back home may have been on the receiving end of similar treatment.

He wonders whether they hated it too; and what Kai's next move will be.

Kai stands looking assessingly at Arthur's naked helplessness, and Arthur begins to be just a little afraid.

He is completely at Kai's mercy; but he doesn't know whether Kai will show him any.

And even if Arthur were willing to ask for it, he can't.

He looks up at Kai, seeing him as if for the first time: a magnificent figure, tall, fur-swathed, his gold chains and studded sword-belt catching the torchlight as he breathes. His smile is wide and full of confidence. Tonight he has the power in this hut, and he knows it. Arthur begins to understand why the young women of the village look at Kai the way they do.

Kai's eyes meet his own, and Arthur knows Kai can see his anger and fear and desire, all laid bare along with his body. He forces himself to set aside his pride and plead wordlessly with Kai to let him go. But Kai shakes his head.

'Not yet. When you've given me what I want, I will set you free… and I may even untie you.'

Arthur rolls his head back and forth in frustration. He isn't used to this. He's lost or avoided physical conflicts before, yes; but always he has had his negotiating skills to fall back on. Or his family or his troops to come to his aid. And now, alone, trussed and gagged, he is forced to accept that he is no longer in control of this situation. His only option is surrender. But to whom, or to what, is he surrendering?

And what exactly does Kai want from him?

Kai takes a step towards the hearth, and slowly and deliberately takes the gold chains from around his neck, setting them aside on the table. He unbuckles his belt and puts it down, laying his axe carefully beside it, running a finger over the edge of the blade and along the shaft before he lets it go. Then he unlaces his tunic and draws it unhurriedly over his head, followed by his shirt, and stands stretching himself luxuriously in the warmth of the fire, like a sleek cat at the hearthside. He does not deign to look at Arthur, although he must surely know that Arthur's eyes are following his every movement, taking in the smooth curves and clean lines of his lean body, watching every flicker of the light on his golden hair and tanned skin.

He sits down on the bench and takes off his boots with exaggerated care, then stands up again and turns his back to Arthur.

He unfastens the waistband of his breeches and slowly, slowly works his hands inside them and pulls them down, then steps out of them.

All Arthur can do is watch; so he watches.

Kai turns round again, and Arthur catches his breath. He has seen Kai naked more times than he could count, but it seems to him that he has never looked properly before. He longs to stride across the hut, take that beautiful body in his arms, run his hands and his mouth over that warm skin...

But he is powerless. He will have to wait and hope for Kai to come to him.

Kai, however, is in no hurry. He crosses the room at a leisurely pace and once again looks down at Arthur on the bed. He smiles. 'I can see what you want… but first you are going to give me what I want.'

 

He picks up Rolf's fox fur and runs it caressingly through his hands.

'Now then, let me see. Long dark hair and blue eyes, for a start, wasn't it?'

He strokes the fur slowly across his own chest, then leans down to do the same to Arthur, gazing deep into his eyes with an unreadable expression, drawing the fur's glossy softness teasingly across his nipples and taking it away far too soon. He shakes his head. 'Yours is better, I think.' He buries his face in Arthur's hair, runs it between his fingers; then slides a hand round to caress the nape of Arthur's neck, but doesn't keep it there. Arthur moans with frustration behind the gag as Kai turns away.

'And tall… are you tall enough?' Kai sits down on the bed and Arthur's heart leaps with sudden hope as his hands are untied; but it is only for long enough for Kai to take two more pieces of rope and secure his wrists to the head of the bed, stretching him out full-length and helpless. Kai is back, this time with a feather in his hand. Knowing his brother's weakness, he strokes the tip of it all the way down his body and back again, seeking out the most sensitive spots and tickling relentlessly until Arthur is breathless and wriggling. He struggles in his bonds, but they hold firm. There is a brief respite as Kai takes the feather to his own body, stroking himself sensuously, across his flat belly, along his own proud erection and over its tip, his eyes never leaving Arthur's. He does the same to Arthur's body too, the feather's point tracing a fine line between pleasure and torment, leaving him hot and hard and yearning for more. Kai smiles. 'Now you're tall. That will do nicely for me.'

Hope rises in Arthur's spirit once more, as Kai takes the flask of oil, pours a little into his palm, and spreads it over his fingers until they are shining with it.

'Long legs…' Kai muses. An oiled fingertip traces a path up Arthur's thigh, stopping just short of his crotch. Arthur arches his back off the bed, but to no avail; the merciless finger writes a matching line up his other thigh, and stops. 'And a nice arse.' Longing unbearably for Kai's touch, Arthur twists his body to one side, swallowing his pride, offering himself.

Kai looks, and smiles. 'Very nice. Can't think of one I've liked better. In fact…that just makes me want to…'  
He pours more oil onto his fingers.

 

Arthur waits for Kai to accept his surrender, and come to him.

Kai stands close beside the bed, makes a ring with his oiled fingers and thumb, slides it smoothly, defiantly, over the head of his own prick, and works it up and down. Arthur can see every bead of sweat, every golden hair, every fold of gleaming skin; he can smell the sweet, exotic fragrance of the oil mingling with the musky scent of Kai's body. He has never wanted Kai so badly. Surely Kai will not refuse him now…

Kai adds a second oiled hand to the first, moving it with an insistent rhythm; he throws his head back and gasps with pleasure. Arthur can hardly bear to watch; but neither can he bear to look away. Kai must be ready. His tip is wet and glistening. Arthur can feel his own body responding in kind. He aches for those oiled fingers to fold around him, to release him, to breach him; for Kai's hardness to enter him and break him apart.

'You want me,' Kai says, softly, pausing for a moment and looking into Arthur's eyes.

Arthur's heart goes cold; his surrender is being rejected.

Kai is still angry with him.

Ashamed and heartsick, exposed in all his weakness, he watches as Kai pleasures himself, expertly and unhurriedly, his eyes now closed as though to shut Arthur out. He makes small, warm sounds of enjoyment as he rides his curled fingers, picking up the pace, occasionally rubbing his thumb over his tip, until Arthur sees his buttocks clench and a shudder run through him: he is coming. He glances down at the bed, to make sure Arthur is still watching him, then releases himself with a final firm stroke, his spill arching through the air to be wasted among the straw and rushes of the floor. Arthur lies helpless in his bonds, overwhelmed with misery and disappointment, his own erection thrusting uselessly into empty air.

Surely it can get no worse. Surely now Kai is satisfied…

Kai kneels down on the floor beside the bed, then gives a grunt of pain; it seems he has knelt on something hard. He shifts it aside, kneels down again, and murmurs in Arthur's ear: 'Soft skin. I said I wanted that, too, didn't I? Now, let's see.'

Arthur turns his face to Kai's, but Kai moves back, out of reach. He picks up something from the floor, then leans over the bed, reaching across Arthur's body to unfasten his wrists from the bedposts, getting to his feet and deftly slipping out of Arthur's grasp as he reaches out weakly, desperately, to clutch at him.

He is holding the woman's shift in his hands.

Arthur sinks back on the bed, defeated, ready to accept whatever humiliation Kai sees fit to impose on him now. If this is what Kai needs, Arthur is willing to give it to him. If Kai wanted blood, Arthur would be willing to give him that too, if it would banish the hurt and the coldness from Kai's eyes. No price would be too high to restore him to his place in Kai's heart, the place he's always taken for granted but which it seems he has forfeited unknowingly. For the first time in his life, Arthur feels himself truly powerless: Kai is asking something of him, something very profound and important, and if he cannot provide it he may lose him forever.

But he still has no idea what the answer is.

Kai draws the fine white cloth tantalisingly across Arthur's belly. 'So soft… and so clean…'

He puts a hand under Arthur's shoulder and lifts him into a sitting position. Arthur offers no resistance, but closes his eyes so as not to have to see this indignity.

Kai pauses for a moment. 'But I think we can do still better…'

A faint rustling, and Arthur feels Kai grasp his right wrist. Something is pulled over his hand and up his arm, and there is a slight coldness against the skin of his back as his left arm is also slipped into the garment. Kai's fingers burn him with every least contact as they fasten the lacings and tie his hands in front of him.

 

Then Arthur is pushed back down onto the bed, and his eyes open wide in shock and pain.

This is not the soft white undergarment of some Cornish maiden: it is the black shirt of penance that Llud had the village smith make for Rolf, lined with pointed metal studs to dig into the skin with each movement.

Arthur arches his back, and twists from side to side, but every position he tries is worse than the last. Finally he gives up and lies very still, trying not to breathe too deeply.

'That's better.' Kai's voice is quiet and level. He draws a finger slowly down Arthur's chest, watching dispassionately as Arthur flinches. Then he does it again, more gently, smiling as he sees that, against his will, Arthur finds the touch arousing.

 

Arthur is utterly humiliated. He has no control over what is happening to him. Pain and pleasure have become indistinguishable, and his mind is in turmoil as Kai continues to torment him.

His body is screaming for release, but he longs still more desperately for Kai to show him some simple kindness.

But both seem further off than ever.

He doesn't understand.

Why? Why is Kai doing this to him?

And then it hits Arthur like an axe blow. This is what it is like to be Kai. This is what Kai felt, all the years before they were together, wanting but not having, looking but not touching, needing but never being able to ask. Never being in control; always having to surrender, to be satisfied with what Arthur chose to give him. And even since they've been together, this is what Kai has suffered every time Arthur has been sharp with him, instead of kind. And Arthur is so often sharp with him…

Their eyes meet. Arthur holds Kai's gaze with his own, the points inside the shirt digging painfully into his back, willing his love and remorse to show in his face, pleading silently with Kai to see that he understands at last…

Tears well up and blind him; he closes his eyes in despair.

Kai makes a sudden choking sound, and Arthur feels his bonds being untied. He is lifted up, and the hated shirt is stripped away. Kai lays him back on the bed, handling Arthur's bruised, sore body with careful tenderness. His tears are hot on Arthur's face as he takes the gag out and kisses him, his mouth gentle and soft, then lies down beside him and holds him close. Kai's skin is warm and blissfully smooth after the torment of the spiked shirt; Arthur presses against him, sobbing and shivering, and Kai takes him in hand without him even needing to ask. His touch is kind and firm on Arthur's aching length. Arthur is coming almost as soon as Kai's fingers have closed around him; his ecstasy is deep, almost painful, and frightening in its intensity. It threatens to sweep him away utterly. But he has complete trust in Kai, now; he buries his face in Kai's shoulder to muffle his cries, and Kai holds him, helps him, stays with him, giving him everything he needs, until it is finally over and Arthur is limp and spent.

Now that his ordeal is finished, Arthur can neither move nor speak. He can't even open his eyes. He just wants to lie here for ever and have Kai take care of him. He feels Kai cleaning him, turning him over, covering him with blankets, and finally sliding in beside him and putting an arm around him; all without a word.

Arthur lies with his aching head on Kai's shoulder, feeling Kai's hand gently stroking his hair. This simple comfort is as deeply pleasurable as anything he has felt before.

Arthur heaves a sigh, and murmurs, 'Thank you.'

Kai is contrite. 'Arthur, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I wanted to make you understand. I couldn't think of another way to tell you. I've tried everything, over the years…'

'Ssshh.' Arthur pulls Kai to him and holds him. 'You did right. I needed to be told again. And this time I heard you… and I promise you, I will not forget.'

'And there'll be no reproaches?' Kai's voice is anxious.

Arthur smiles, and settles himself more comfortably.

'Not from me.'


End file.
